


Dear Ed

by EmberandShadow



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Arkham!Oswald, Hope, M/M, Nygmobblepot, a little angsty as well, fluff-ish, letters from behind bars, reassurance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-01
Updated: 2016-05-05
Packaged: 2018-05-30 10:29:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6420130
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmberandShadow/pseuds/EmberandShadow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Oswald most definitely wrote Ed letters when in Arkham, whether he sent them or not.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I'll Be Fine

_Dear Ed,_

_I feel like I should explain myself to you. I should explain my reasoning for handing myself over. I can hear your words even now, ‘What were you thinking? You don’t even know what you’re getting yourself into!” I’m fine, Ed, if you’re wondering. And I know you are. I know how you worry. I want to say I’m sorry. I’m sorry for leaving without so much as a note explaining myself. I didn’t mean to cause that fight after you found me on the street. I just didn’t want to drag you into my mess._

_I left so I wouldn’t hurt you. I left so that you wouldn’t be suspected in aiding a criminal. You know this, you_ must _know this. And I turned myself in because I couldn’t stand it anymore. I didn’t want to be running all the time. And no matter how many times you tell me I should have just left Gotham, I’ll never regret not leaving. Not leaving you. But I’m fine. I promise._

_Arkham isn’t what I expected, but I’ll make it through. I just have to stay here long enough to prove I’m ‘sane’. And that shouldn’t take too long, admittedly, due to me actually being sane. I’ll be home soon, Eddie. I’ll be back with you before you know it._

_Don’t worry. I love you._

_Sincerely,_

_Oswald._


	2. Slipping

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things aren't as peachy as Oswald thought they would be

_Dear Ed,_

_I’m fine. At least that’s what I keep telling myself. These walls suffocate me and the screams that come at night do nothing to comfort me. I can’t count how many times I’ve cried. How many nights I’ve fallen asleep with the tears still wet on my face. But, don’t worry, Ed. I’m still fine. I’ll still make it through this. I’ve made it through worse. They can’t break me. And even if they get close, I’ll still have my love for you to keep me going. They’ll never take that away from me._

_I hope you’re doing well, my friend. I hope things at work are going smoothly, that no one’s giving you too much of a hard time. I hope you don’t miss me too much. I hope you don’t blame yourself for where I am. None of this is your fault. You couldn’t have stopped me even if you tried, you couldn’t have convinced me not to do this. It was my choice, and yeah, you were right. I didn’t know what I was getting myself into. But I’m fine._

_I miss you. Oh, Ed, you don’t know how much I miss you. You don’t know how much I long to feel your arms around me again. I dream about you. I keep you close to my heart because it’s the only thing I have left to hold on to. You’re going to get me through this, I know it. If I can just keep you in my thoughts I can make it through this hell._

_I’m going to be fine. I love you._

_Yours,_

_Oswald._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prepare yourselves for part three, coming soon <3


	3. A Twisted Mind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oswald's mind is more fractured than ever now.

_Dear Ed,_

_Help me. This place is a prison and I am so scared. I can’t sleep at night. I can’t close my eyes without the nightmares infiltrating my mind. They’re torturing me. This place is nothing like it seems, the goings on inside are terrible, torturous, terrifying. I need you, Ed. I don’t think I can make it anymore. My own screams have been added to the cacophony that reverberates through the halls at night. I-_

_Everything is fine. They’re helping me. It’s therapy. To help me be better, nicer, kinder. And it’s working. They’ve helped me so much. I’ve done so many horrible things. It’s time for me to repent, to become better. To change._

_-want to kill them all. Professor Strange is vicious and sadistic and I want to rip his skin off of his bones, tear those thoughtful, watchful, eyes from their sockets and stuff them down his throat. I want to fight every employee here just to_ feel _something again. Oh, Eddie, you don’t know how full of rage I am. I want-_

_Professor Strange has been nothing but kind. He’s helping me be normal again. To return to sanity. He tells me that I’m a good person inside. That second chances are possible, and that I can reach normalcy again. He’s helped me so much._

_-to strangle these horrible thoughts out of my head. I want to kill myself to get rid of the nightmares. I’ve fallen so far, Eddie. I need you now more than I’ve ever needed you. I can’t be in this place anymore or I fear I may actually lose my mind. They say they’re helping me, that these treatments are good for me. But It doesn’t feel like it. They’re killing me, Ed. From the inside. Turning my mind against me. Changing who I am. They’re-_

_Violence is never the answer, Ed. And I fear that you are going down a dark and dangerous path. Please, for your own sake, don’t give in to the bad thoughts. Don’t turn to violence and anger to solve your problems. It won’t help. It’ll only make things worse. It’ll create a pit in your stomach like ice, weighing you down until you can’t breathe. Trust me, I should know._

_-breaking me down, tearing me apart piece by piece. Please, Ed. Save me. I don’t care how. I just need you to get here as quickly as you can. I think they’re already starting to influence me. My thoughts. I fear that if you don’t come quickly I’ll have lost myself by the time this ends. The me you once knew is slipping away and it’s terrifying me._

_Please, Ed. Come quickly._

_Forever Yours,_

_Oswald._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope the switch between Nice!Wald and normal Oswald wasn't too confusing <3

**Author's Note:**

> This feels way to short, next two are longer, promise <3


End file.
